I find that writing about myself is hard. I mean, what is there to talk about? I know, I know, there are indeed things to talk about, sometimes it's just hard to make yourself sound interesting...I digress.
But yes, there are things to talk about. Things I enjoy, where I'm at in my life. So I'll talk about those things.
The other thing is, I always feel like when I talk about myself, it sounds like a dating profile. So I'll do my best to stay away from that.
I think I'm finally at this point in my life where I'm happy with myself. I feel comfortable being single, and figuring out where I want my life to go. I'm so relieved to know that I'm the only one I need to take care of, it's just so nice. I'm not at a point where I can add someone to my life, with everything that's gone on, I need to just be with myself. I'm at a point where I actually want to go back to school. And I'm happy to know that that's something that I actually want to do, I now know that I want a to get a degree.
I FINALLY have a picture of what I want to achieve in the next five years. I've been asked that so many times, and never really had an idea, just guesses. But now, I know what I REALLY want. I want to move away from home, go back to school and do my absolute best to get a degree, or very close to getting a degree. I want to be able to travel to a few more places; whether that be in the states or different countries. Mostly, I just want to figure myself out, try new things, but also feel very self-aware, and stable in my life. I'm working on it, but for the longest time I have felt worried about the future, and I just want to be at peace when I think about the future. I want to know that I will be safe and sound if something happens. I'm gonna do whatever it takes to find that and achieve it.
I want more days where I feel relaxed and at peace. When I picture that? I imagine myself at my family's cabin in Hatch, sitting outside on the deck watching a thunderstorm pass over the canyon, holding a mug of hot chocolate or tea, wrapped in a blanket. Just imagining this scene brings absolute relaxation to me. Sure, I can't be there most of the year, but if I can find parts of that image, I'll be forever grateful. If I could just have the thunderstorm, or being wrapped up in a blanket with a warm drink in hand, that would bring me happiness.
I know it's a little early for goals for the new year, but I don't think there's really a requirement for when you want to give yourself goals. I want to be the best daughter, sister, granddaughter, niece, cousin, and friend that I can be. To me that means staying in touch, taking a genuine interest in what those close to me are doing with their lives. Again, I want to do my absolute best to get back to school and move away. I want to want to live a healthy lifestyle, which to me means eating properly and exercising in some way, and you know, taking my medication. I want to have enough going on in my life that I don't think about spending time on technology, I want to surround myself with family, friends, work, school, and activities. I want to be well read, an amateur traveler, and hobby filled person. I also want to surround myself with my religion. Do my absolute best, to feel my best.
So my family and friends, if any of you are reading this, please, let's spend time with each other. If you have any recipe you want to try, let's make it together, or if you want to be fed, I'll feed you. If you have book recommendations, please share. If you want to go somewhere together, I'll do my best to make it. If you just want to talk, let's talk. If you have a favorite form of exercise, I'm all ears. If you have favorite scriptures, talks, or church-related topics, do share. If you have none of the above, that's cool too, but I can always get to know each one of you better, and that's all I really care about, so let's hang out.
I feel excited, and I'm happy.
Mercedes
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